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Choices Job Loss Issues

Job Loss and The Victim Trap

You have lost your job and there seems to be nothing on the horizon. Are you into the “woe is me” and “my life is ruined” thinking?

Last August 2009, my husband was released from a profession job. We had moved to the area 16 months earlier for this job. It is devastating at any age and particularly when it occurs in the mid 50 age. As the wife of the recently unemployed, I am also very stressed. I have my own professional dreams and goals and I think they may be going down the drain.

I was talking to a professional colleague. I was in the negative self talk. “My husband doesn’t have a job, woe is me”. She called me on it and rightly so.

My friend is right. What we think about and talk about is what we get. It is the Law of Attraction.

Most of the time I do pretty well. I realize that my husband and I have been carried. Don’t know how, but we have. Sometimes I get so discouraged. I feel like I have been standing on shifting sands for a long time.

My friend got me to thinking. When we feel good about ourselves we are connected to Source (Divine or God and Mother Earth). We get our spiritual energy for God, if you will . It comes from above our head down into our heart. Our physical body draws energy from the center of the earth up into our hearts. In those times we feel good about ourselves, we have a continual ‘source’ of energy from above and below.

When we get scared, we un-ground and break our connection with Source. There is no longer a ‘source’ of energy. As people, we have learned that it can be easier to take “your” energy than reconnect ourselves. Negative thinking, emotions and self talk is a way of creating a cord that attaches to someone else’s energy field. In that moment we (I) become a “vampire” stealing energy. Oh, what a thought that I could steal energy.

We as a people are so enmeshed in the “system” that we forget that we are 100% responsible for our lives. When the “system” spits us out, we get confused. We forget that we are responsible for self. It is easy to slip into “woe is me” and victim thinking.

There are moments that life sucks. The less time we spend in “life sucks” the better. When we have a setback, it is an opportunity to rethink our goals and reprioritize our lives. It is also an opportunity to trim the fat, so to speak. My husband and I are cleaning house. We are getting rid of a lot of things that no longer serve us. It is interesting to watch each other’s process. Each of us is going through the grieving process. We are never in the same spot at the same time.

The house is on the market. We have a back up plans A, B, and “seat of our pants”. The thing to remember is that every negative thought moves us closer to ruin and the “poor house.” Every positive thought and comment moves us closer to the next fabulous opportunity and new life.

Think positive. Dream positive. Then figure out the steps that will lead you to your knew dream.

Blessings, Mary Pat

Mary Pat FitzGibbons RN MS writes on life issues that empowers you to become your highest dream for yourself.

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